Whatever

and it's over. Again.

Whatever. This is ridiculous.

He loves me, he said it, he cried even... but the little things like where I am in my life (at the end of it?) and where he is at his, my age, these factors stop him cold and he refuses to allow this to become more for him.

Fine. Good enough, I guess. Obviously he's the driver of his bus, seems like a fair decision.

But, jesus, I'm done with this drama (I'm pretty sure).

I am going to miss the hell out him, his touch, his smell, the sweetness between us - the lure.

But I gotta pack this shit up, I can't keep myself open to him like this anymore, he's too volatile of a soul right now. I need to respect that and let him go - because really, who is the adult here?

He ended it because he doesn't want what I want and he understands he's not being a good soul taking what I am giving without reciprocating in kind - emotionally and sexually. Seems pretty adult of him.

So, what's my fucking problem?