When he came over the other night to say good-bye and discuss the end, it was the same as last time. He cried a lot, talked about the reasons why he loves me, said that he's never met anyone he could have such honest and real discussions about life with. Said that he loved the parts of my life I shared with him... . Said he was probably an idiot for letting this go.
Me? I don't know. I don't know if I trust how real all that is for him.
We had reached a stage in a relationship where the next level was normal everyday life, it had to evolve once again.
And I don't know how I feel about that or if I just overwhelming sense that he is incapable of that while I am far too capable given my extra life experience and maturity.
and I am sore, because I felt things for him - things that I'm not sure now were misplaced or misguided, perhaps.
I am sad that I was wrong in thinking we could do this.
I'm sad.
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